[SATIRE] Easy, Breezy, Beautiful Bobcats


Story by Valeria Munoz, Staff Writer

Calling all beauty and makeup fanatics! Beauty classes will be available next year at Boca High. Sponsored by Mrs. Horowitz, the class will consist of learning how to make your own makeup out of practical products such as crayons. One of the projects will be making your own lipstick out of Starbursts talk about a delicious lip gloss. Apart from that the course will teach students a variety of makeup looks that are appropriate for a specific occasion. The categories include a sports banquet, navy ball, and homecoming or prom. The latter will take up the majority of third and fourth quarter. Students (yes freshmen and sophomores that means you too) may even receive sneak peeks of the venue. However, this bit is still up for discussion with administration.

A major highlight of the class includes trips to professional makeup studios to learn from the greats.  Rumors have been going around that students will pay a visit to Disney and Universal’s makeup artists in the character department.  Students opinions range from elated to outrage on the curriculum change.

Sophomore Samantha Mejia believes it is “a waste of parent’s tax dollars.”

Sophomore Rhea Singh sees the ultimate benefit of the class as “giving girls more self-confidence.”

Guys have voiced their perspectives as well protesting for equal rights a demanding a “Guide to Becoming a Dapper Gentlemen” course.

Anyway before you start assuming that this class will be easy and breezy like a Cover Girl commercial, you should be warned of the final exam. The exam won’t be a traditional pen and paper test. It will include a set of daunting tasks that must be completed in the allotted time of two hours and is known as “Makeup Mayhem.” The students will engage in a cosmetics scavenger hunt where they must roam the entire campus for exclusive makeup items from the coveted Too Faced Chocolate Bar palette to drugstore brands such as Maybelline or L’Oréal. Then they must create a unique but appropriate makeup look for a panel of teachers. The panel will rotate throughout the year. Stop debating whether or not it may be Maybelline and give beauty classes a shot next year.

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